Growing up?

Linkin Park
In The End lyrics

It starts with
One thing
I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mindI designed this rhyme to explain in due time
All I know

Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It's so unreal

Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Tried to hold on, but didn't even know
I wasted it all just towatch you go

I kept everything inside
And even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me
Will eventually be
A memory
Of a time

I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter.

I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter.

One thing
I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mindI designed this rhyme to remind myself how I
Tried so hard

In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised
It got so far

Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end

You kept everything inside
And even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I

I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter

I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter

I put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There's only one thing you should know

I put my trust in you!
Pushed as far as I can go!
For all this!
There's only one thing you should know!

I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter

I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter.

Well I was listening to this song on my way to work pondering life when it hit me like a brick to the nuts! This song pretty well sums up my last relationship. Dont know why it made me think of it but it did. Last night I was also speaking with another friend about roomates when I realised something. My first roomate was a very good friend of mine and some things happend and he ended up moving out and we havn't talked since. I could never figure out why he moved out and didn't tell me he was moving or didn't tell me what I did. It took me about a year to realise this. It was last night when I was talking to a friend about her best friend and her moving in together. I advised to be careful cause it hardly ever works out. Then it got me thinking of what happend with us and this also hit me like a cue stick to the face. So now I ask myself do I try to make amends or do I just let him know I now realise what I did and apologize and let it be that and see what he does? Im going more for the second one that way I know I did the right thing. I don't know whats causing this to come to me all of the sudden, maybe im maturing more then I realise, either way I am glad I realised what I did and can now let him know and apologize. Well thats about all thats coming out for now so.. untill next time...